Nobodys perfect

I hate it all go burn in the fires
a cesspit of shadow of devils and liars

Friends… haha what friends?
its easy to say things when i need them not
but when im down and depressed you dont say alot
its all pretend you use me to make you feel better
but return the favour? no i got to write a letter

but here im just venting i dont even care
whether your gone or whether your here

What hurts from you is you dont even try
this isnt about you but i hate that you lie

not about yourself but about how much i mean
im drowning in sorrow and your hands left unseen

I can be strong for others why cant i be strong for myself
I thought it was real but thats all i get?… what a shame..
Its over and over that i play this cruel game

I drown in my words like i don’t know how to swim
Hijacked by emotion i have no time to think
I just let it pour out smothered by it i sink

a shrug of your shoulder and turn of your head
haha way to save me friend im already dead

My Happily Never After

Im scared…
Im scared of you of what you think
Of what you say, what you want
What you don’t…

I wont ever tell you first i wont even tell you second
Im a coward i know but that’s how Ive survived

You will never know and that’s okay
It will hound my mind but eventually one day
Ill forget, you’ll forget me
And that’s just how it will be

Your answer terrifies me
Its my greatest fear
I feel so paper thin like im ready to tear
I know the answer already i can see it in my heart
Im not stupid i knew it from the start
Why do i always want what i know i cant have?

Im not the most interesting
or have the perfect look
I might not be someones first choice
But im a great choice
That’s what i need to believe
That’s what i wish i could see
But that’s something i know i just cant be…

Im not fearless im not even brave
Ill take my secrets and pain to the grave
I wish i had the courage to try

Life is a puzzle i just cant solve
But in this moment around you my whole world will revolve
You’ll be the one ill wish i could speak too
Every time your in sight
But against all my might you’ll always be…
My golden apple and eternal plight

A Dream Unwritten

Life is like a dream so confusing, so consuming , a nightmare full of blissful moments

Why am i confused?
Lost in this dream
Lost in a nightmare of bliss and despair
Fear is my savior
The darkness withing my heart
Every time i wake
My heart my soul
Is so easy to break
Please tread carefully….

Is this our charade?
Our waltz
Our masquerade
Please let it last…

I gave you three wishes
But i need one of my own
Surrounded by love
Why do i feel so alone

I know this is silly
I know im a fool
But i don’t understand why you think im so cool….

Perfections a virtue
All i have are sins
All that’s left of me
Is what i pretend to be

I promised to be myself
To show you the real me
But how can i be calm
When i don’t know what you’ll see
Dressed up for so long
As who im supposed to be

I need this for myself
So im going to take a chance
Ill wait here at our ball
And hope you come to dance